celebrity hunk Cam Gigandet shows off his tight butt

It looks like an Asian man's armpit.

What happened?

I don't know. Okay, I woke up this morning and it wasn't there.

And that's not even the worst part.

It's in your ass?

No, no. It's in my apartment.

That's good. You know where it is.

Okay. It's a person.

What?

My dick is an asshole.

He's brown?

No, white.

Is he bald?

No.

Chubby?

No.

Wrinkled?

Would you shut the fuck up?

Okay, I'm sorry.

What are you gonna do?

What can I do?